Oh No! The Flu

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Yep, in case you’ve been wondering where I’ve been, I’ve had the flu. If you have managed to be one of the few people who have not caught the flu this year, consider yourself very, very lucky. This is nasty! I have just spent the better part of four days in bed. I am trying to stay out of bed today for longer and longer stretches of time, because I would like to salvage some of my spring break! Yes, this is my spring break! I became sick the very day spring break started! Oh, and I had such plans for spring break: a trip to the used bookstore, shop for a new pair of spring sandals, get my hair highlighted, grocery shop in my new exciting way…pathetic, I know, but hey, now I can’t even do that!!

One small spot of comfort through all this has been my old lady cat, Scrappycat. She has spent every moment curled up on the bed with me, only getting up to eat and use the litter box and occasionally guarding the door to my room. At one point, I was lying sprawled across the bed, hiking up pajama legs and sleeves, trying to expose burning flesh to the cool air (and for those porn people who just found this site by searching for exposed flesh, sorry, you’ve come to the wrong place, there was nothing hot or exciting about it…well, it was hot, but definitely not exciting), and I see her all curled up and it feels a smidgen better. Then I remembered this show I saw on TV about a cat in a nursing home who could sense when people were dying, and she would go lie on their bed and be with them when the died, and then she would get up and go to another person’s bed, and so on. I struggled to bring Scrappycat into focus (I wasn’t wearing my glasses), and see if I could sense any ulterior motive. I wanted to ask, “Hey, Scrappy, did you happen to see that show about the cat in the…”, but I couldn’t talk because my throat hurt. And then thank goodness, I remembered that there is where Scrappy sleeps every day. It wasn’t Scrappy coming to me, it was me coming to Scrappy. Okay, good, crisis adverted.

I am a side sleeper and one of the things my chiropractor always said was to sleep with a pillow between your knees to relieve pressure on your back. After the first 24 hours or so in bed, my back was killing me (above and beyond the flu pain), so I tried it, and it works! It really works! The logistics of it are kind of cumbersome. I would lie on one side, place pillow between knees, close eyes, and lie there in agony. You see, you hurt way to much too sleep, but you cannot, I repeat, cannot, keep your eyes open. So, you lay on one side, until your neck becomes stiff, then you remove the pillow, turn over, reposition pillow, and repeat about 15 million times over the course of the next 4 days. The was extremely challenging during the “chills” part of the ordeal, because then this maneuver must be done while under a sheet, a quilt, and a big heavy comforter.

Well, I believe that I have come to maximum of my staying up time, and I’m going to go back to bed for a little nap. One last note, I logged on to Google reader, my goodness, people, I had 656 items to read!!! You are a prolific bunch. But I had to mark them all as “read”. I really couldn’t face trying to read through all that. And I know I’ve probably missed some brilliant posts, and I’m sorry for that, but really, 656!! Even if I spent 30 seconds per post, that would be…well, I don’t know how long that would be, but it seems like it would be quite a long time!

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  1. says

    LOL- that’s a good thing that Scrappycat isn’t the Death Kitty. Oh, jeez, that’s funny.

    Ugh, that flu is nasty, though. What a wretched spring break! I have to say, there are strawberry and mango Helados bars at Walmart (Mexican fruit ice cream bars) that will soothe any sore, parched, dry, rotten throat and body. :)

    Hope you are feeling better soon!!

  2. Debbie Cook says

    How can you still be so funny when you are feeling like death? LOL! Hope you are on the mend and can get to that exciting new way of grocery shopping very soon!!

  3. says

    LOL Sorry you’ve been sick. Glad you’re doing better and hope the rest of your spring break is more like you wanted it to be. Love reading your blog and seeing that humor that is so you.

  4. says

    I hope you are feeling better already, dear Pam. Your cat sounds like a lot of fun! :)

    I have tried that thing with the pillow a couple of times and it really works. Glad you can find some relief too.

  5. says

    Oh man, I’m glad you’re getting back into the groove. It’s hard, and every adult I know is getting that flu. I hope the angel of death passes by my doorstep.

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